It has been a hard few weeks with N's case. Just a lot of changes and a lot of worry on our part. Like before, I really can't go into details, but there is a lot going on with birth mom and, just today, I got a call from N's SW and the visits are moving back to supervised. They have been unsupervised for almost a year, so this is a BIG change. While we are somewhat happy about this change, we are sad, too. I didn't think it would hit us this way. I thought I would be elated - jumping up and down. Nope.
We have grown to really care for his birth mom. It breaks our hearts to see a family struggle so...Yes, I know. It is all about choices, but have we all made perfect choices throughout our lives? I haven't - and I know Kev would be on the same page with me here. As hard as this has all been (and continues to be) it has been amazing to see how well birth mom has done. So to have this happen is really, REALLY hard. And we just didn't expect to feel that way.
So please pray for us as we move forward in this situation. We are trying to figure out how we can support birth mom in all of this - how we can love her and not overstep our relationship. We love N so much - and we know she knows that. He turns 2 this weekend - he had a visit set up with her on his birthday (Saturday) and it is now looking like that won't happen.
Jesus loves us so desperately - in our messy, out-of-sync lives. That is our life with N - very messy, not cookie cutter reality, and by no means ordinary. We have a constant though - a hope that we cling to in the midst of all the upheaval. I just want her to see that - and, even more, experience that hope.
I will keep you all posted - thanks for praying for us!
